It seems like the plot forgets he’s there too, as a crucial turn late in the game relies on a piece of information about Vincent that was either cut or forgotten earlier on, leading to one of the most bizarre villain dispatches in recent memory. A patchy, obviously improv-ed skit with Blart and Vincent arguing about who’s crazier is the closest that the film gets to raising a titter. It gets to where you easily forget that Neal McDonough is in this, except for when he does show up with his phoned-in mania. Aside from all the “fat man fall down” jokes that persist throughout James’ filmography, the sequel also reprises the previous film’s flattest running joke, about Blart’s hypoglycaemia.
#PAUL BLART MALL COP MOVIE FREE WINDOWS#
Repeated auto-accidents, running into clear glass windows and getting beat up by a peacock are just par for the course. Having started on awkward form, the film sets the bar just as low as it can, so that a moustachioed Kevin James can trip over it at any given opportunity. Seriously, considering that this is nominally a family movie, Blart’s wife and mother are written out in a manner as abrupt as Newt and Hicks in Alien 3. Jayma Mays had scheduling conflicts with Glee and Shirley Knight shows up for one downright disturbing scene. Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is 94 minutes long, but turns out to be absurdly bottom-heavy in terms of actual incident.Īside from that, the first act is largely about setting up how terrible things have gotten for Blart since the last film, with an almost perverse way of writing out characters who didn’t return for the sequel. This covers the basics of the nominal plot, but almost broaches spoiler territory, if you go by the definition where you shouldn’t give away that happens after the first half hour of a film. Though racked by his own ego, Blart stumbles upon their plot and teams up with fellow convention delegates to save the day. The authority to make a citizen's arrest.However, dastardly high roller Vincent (Neal McDonough) is planning to put Vegas’ world-famous security to the test by robbing the hotel where the convention is being held. Waterproof shoes and Baggies on the socks. There's gonna be a new shipment tomorrow. This year, it falls on a Black Friday, whichīasically like a thermal they have you wear. I'm so sorry if I called you the wrong thing.įor the busiest shopping day of the year? No, it's just that you said security guard,
It's Officer Blart, reporting from Sector 5. I'd like to welcome you to our mall.Īnd then, like, sell it to one of those shows, Please pull to the right, out of traffic.ĭriving kind of recklessly back there, sir. Sir, I'm gonna need you to pull to the right. Left hip forward, placing your right hand They found me later in the fetal position, So what made you want to pursue security?Ĭonfusing, right? Cut yourself some slack. You see, if we could reroute the customers You're gonna want to go to Lord and Taylor. Nifty video that you made a few years back. "If I don't have a girlfriend by November,īack when she was still trying to trick me. With being happy for the rest of your life? I wish I had a coworker here, like, "Tyler, It's the busiest shopping day of the year. Here we go.Īnd, you know, not always, but sometimes, We all have our crosses to bear, sweetheart.Īnd can't really get it out. To be admitted into the training program. Script-O-Rama afterwards - because reading is good for your noodle. At least you'll have some Paul Blart: Mall Cop quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?
#PAUL BLART MALL COP MOVIE FREE FREE#
I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free toĭrop me a line. Transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly Voila! Finally, the Paul Blart: Mall Cop script is here for all you fans of the Kevin James movie.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop Script - transcript from the screenplay and/or the Kevin James movie Paul Blart: Mall Cop Script - Dialogue Transcript
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